Being a mom

I LOVE being a mom.  Having Kennedy in my life is the best thing ever.  Period.   For details read on.

First of all, burps and foofs have never been so cute. or celebrated.

We love the little faces she makes. and seeing bits of ourselves in her is so neat.

Her skin is so soft I cannot stop kissing her.

It's adorable to see her looking around at the world and her eyes widening at new things.

Kennedy loves being outside just like mom and dad do.

While the rest of us floated Oneida Narrows, Grandma Moon, aunt Leslie and Kennedy enjoyed outside.  She loved it.

Derek and I sometimes talk about "Ensign pictures"--times when everyone is arranged so perfectly it's like it's been posed for a picture on the front of a church magazine.  We keep laughing because we'll find ourselves in completely perfect Ensign pictures.  Holding hands and gazing at her in awe, looking at each other with more love than ever.  Dude.  Life is sweet.

I remember always hearing that when you have a baby it's a huge spiritual experience--that you feel so close to God at the moment they hand you the baby the first time.  To be honest, it wasn't like that the very first time.  Having an emergency c-section and being behind the screen, I felt a little separated from the experience.  Loved it and honestly enjoyed it (Guys.  Feeling people dig through you but feeling no pain is kind of amazing.  Sorry to be gross, but just saying.  It's such a neat experience), but spirituality took a little while longer.

But, oh my goodness, when it does come, you really do learn so much and feel God's love so powerfully.  One night I just found myself crying.  I loved Kennedy so much.  And I knew God trusts me with her.  And that she trusts me to be a good mom and take care of her the best I can.

Ignore aunt Jessica's foot.  (it was for a size comparison :) )

I've always loved our temple sealing and been grateful that I could be with Derek forever.  But to  be honest it always felt a little like "oh hooray!  together forever!"--almost like it deserved a hash tag in front of it.  But all the sudden Kennedy came and it became real.  The knowledge that WE WILL BE TOGETHER FOREVER and that we can have her and be connected to her is truly wonderful.  I've never been more motivated to stay righteous and stay on the path so we can make it.  And our wedding day is so much more than it ever was.  Because we were sealed, Kennedy was born into the covenant.  And she's on the path to make it home again to Heavenly Father. #guysthisisreal

I've learned so much about how much God wants the best for us.  As a mom I can't wait to show Kennedy all the wonderful things there are about the world.  There is music, laughter, friendship, Harry Potter, coloring, dreaming, learning, mountains, running, achievement, love.  And I want to do all I can to help her make it back home.   On a similar vein, I also never ever want anything bad to happen to her.  When she's hurting it's all I can do not to cry right along with her.  I dread the day she gets picked on at school or fails a test. (I know it's necessary for learning for there to be trials, so it'll be ok.  But still it's so hard.)  And I know that God feels the same way.  He wants us to be happy.  So the commandments, the trials, the growing pains can't be fun for Him either, but He knows it'll make us happy eventually.  (And He fills in the rest with the beautiful world, literature, friends, family.)

I love sitting down and telling Kennedy stories about Jesus and singing her Primary songs.  We first sung her I am a Child of God and realized--yes that's a song for kids, but oh it's so much a song for the parents.  "Lead me, guide me, walk beside me.  Help me find the way.  Teach me all that I must do to live with Him someday."  Very motivating. I love remembering the little truths in the songs we sing.  And how excited I am to share what I know with her.  There is so much for a little child to learn.

when I say "i love sitting her down" it's usually on my lap.  but baskets are cute for pictures.

The other day we were looking at a picture of Jesus and Derek asked Kennie, "do you remember Jesus?" and she got the biggest grin on.

Fun story and picture to end with.  When I was in preschool, we were asked what we wanted to be when we grew up and I knew that more than anything I wanted to be a mom.  I thought I wanted it then, but I had no idea how wonderful it would be.  I'm so grateful for this amazing blessing.

I can't beg you enough to read the other responses.  Preschoolers are hilarious.